Central Asians Riot Over Lack of Vowels
The people of Kyrgyzstan in central Asia appeared to be settling down again after their sudden revolution. A temporary president is attempting to restore normal order while authorities clean up the mess. Many people around the world had never of this small republic, formerly part of the Soviet Union. Those who had heard of it couldn’t pronounce it – even Polish people have problems pronouncing the country’s name.
It is believed by experts on the region that the citizens had finally rebelled against former president Akayev who was basically a client of Russia. The final straw for the rebelling citizens was when Mr Akayev sold off most of Kyrgyzstan’s remaining stock from the National Vowels Depository.
“We’re sick of not having enough vowels in our nation,” explained Nktn Mxzkptylk, “how can we ever build political, cultural and commerical bridges with the rest of Europe if we no longer possess any vowels?” “We sound like characters from a second-rate hack’s bad fantasy novel, “added her friend Zxqpyy. The European Union’s Language Bureau has promised several million Euros in literary aid while the RAF were already preparing to fly a Hercules transporter filled with crates of fresh vowels to the republic on Saturday.