Copyright this!

As a very frequent movie-goer I get rather tired of having to put up with the long, two-part bloody copyright signs that come up before each and every bloody film. Like, yeah, 99% of people world wide know they ain’t supposed to sit there with vid equipment bootlegging the movie and the 1% who are going in with the express intention of doing so are unlikely to be put off by these boring and overlong captions. I’m getting so annoyed with having to sit through them several times a month I’m almost tempted to vid a movie just to get my own back on the bastards!Some now come with warnings that the staff are equipped with night-vision goggles to spot bootleggers for smeg’s sake! Anyway, saw this on Boing Boing – out of the mouths of babes, as they say:

“Sunday, June 27, 2004

Three-year-old commentator on pre-movie (c) warnings

James took his three-year-old to see Shrek 2 yesterday and when the copyright warning came on at the start of the picture, his son responded appropriately.

I went to see Shrek 2 today with my son Edward who is 3 next week. He was very excited, he loves going to the cinema. However when the copyright warning about taking pictures and video appeared (the one that Cory Doctorow takes pictures of) he said in a very loud voice “blah blah blah blah”, which had me in hysterics if no one else. ”

Which sums it up. Although I’m glad I wasn’t actually there as 3 is a bit too wee for a movie as almost no kid can stay still and quiet through a movie at that age. I’ve been to a few daytimes showings where folk bring in under-5s with them who then make noise continually. Or in last week’s case the kid wasn’t too bad once the movie started but his mother had to lean over and explain everything to him loudly every few minutes. I could have strangled them both after a while of them ruining the whole film.

Then again I feel like that about anyone who makes noises in the cinema (at least kids have the excuse of being kids, but adults?). At a midnight screening one night friends and I were driven to issuing threats to a group of Asians who had brought along friends who obviously didn’t know English and were kindly translating every single line for them throughout the film… At a recent movie a couple of German students were doing the same for a friend who obviously didn’t have as good English skills. While I am impressed with their multi-lingual skills their lack of awareness for others around them wasn’t so impressive. I’m going to have to start carrying a taser into cinemas I reckon. And those bastards who noisily crunch crap tortillas with that rubbery melted ‘cheese’ which looks and smells (and I imagine tastes) like warm cat sick are second on the list.